23 Lessons I Learned by 23

A few weeks ago, I had a sudden realization. I was now 23. Something about this number really stood out to me. Maybe because I was only two years away from the quarter-century mark. Or maybe because there's no Taylor Swift song about being 23. Or probably because I felt like my time to figure shit out was diminishing by the second.

This made me pause and think: what have I learned in my life? Looking back, I realize I should have documented more of my experiences and lessons over the years. If this were the case, maybe this question would have been rhetorical.

This blog post was partly written to address this muse, and it's a post that's been sitting in my draft box for too long. So today is the day I finally post it. Hopefully it helps me take improved measures toward my next 23 (and maybe helps someone who reads it):

1. Invest in your own well-being. It's the highest ROI action you can take.

As an entrepreneur, it's hard to objectively separate yourself from your company. Time and time again, I'm forced to remind myself that a startup's success is a function of the founder's ability to execute and deliver results. Hence, investing in your own health and well-being is one of the highest ROI actions you can take.

2. Stop associating vanity metrics with success.

The tech community has a broken measure for success -- one that's counted by media coverage and capital raised. I've found too many people chase these vanity metrics and start to lose focus of the real goal -- creating a sustainable, growing business.

"About 99% of what you read around early-stage startups who are 'crushing it' is actually false. Founders have a great reality distortion field. It's practically a requirement to make it through the tough times. But, comparing yourself to what you read in the tech press is a losing battle against a fictional opponent. Save yourself the mental anguish -- don't create unrealistic comparisons for yourself."

3. Don't be so rigid about the traditional definition of a 'tech startup.'

Not all industries or ideas are created equal. Some require capital, some don't; some models can scale rapidly, while others take time. Choosing one path over the other doesn't make your company more/less successful.

4. Take advice with a grain of salt.

If we followed the advice of every credible advisor, we would have pivoted more times than a merry go-round. Ultimately, founders have the most context and knowledge behind the inner workings of their business, even if the mentor is a C-suite exec at Amazon.

5. You're not the company. The company is not you.

When people start recognizing you as the 'guy who started company X', it's hard to disassociate yourself from the ups and downs of your job. When the going gets tough, self doubt is so hard to ignore. But don't be so hard on yourself -- take each experience as a learning opportunity and realize business failure isn't an indication of who you are as a person.

6. Be mindful of your time & who you spend it with.

7. Great artists steal. Borrow (and be on the search for) great ideas.

While this rule doesn't apply universally, I've found it to be paramount in a resource-constrained environment. Why build a feature, design, pitch deck, or workflow from scratch, when others have spent millions to test, build, and iterate on similar solutions? If Picasso and Steve Jobs think it's a good idea, I do too.

8. Embrace the opportunities that come with uncertainty.

During university, I was conditioned to follow a certain path. Get good grades, get involved, and ride a swanky internship into a full-time gig. While there's nothing wrong with certainty & linear growth, this would have diverted me away from the exponential growth opportunities that came with my uncertain path.

9. Avoid analysis paralysis at all costs.

Sometimes the data isn't readily available and you need to trust your gut instinct. By the time you wait for more info, the opportunity could be long gone. Anyone can make perfect decisions with perfect information.

10. Take accountability for your actions.

Accountability is a fickle subject, especially in an early-stage startup. With so many people wearing different hats, diffusion of responsibility is a real problem. Do what you say, say what you'll do. Credibility is not given, it's earned.

11. Work with people who can fill your skill gaps.

12. Stop working on what's fun. Work on things that actually matter.

In the grand scheme of things, it doesn't matter if I prefer building out new product features over cold calling new leads. Sometimes, the things that need to get done aren't fun.

13. Find time for friends and family.

14. Stop the car and explore the opportunities.

The biggest reason ideas remain as concepts is the preconceived notion that someone, somewhere with more time, money and experience must have built and launched it.

15. Don't be arrogant. It's the easiest way to tarnish your reputation.

16. Find experienced, credible mentors/advisors.

17. Be humble: When it comes to investors, everything is a no except a term sheet.

We learned this brutal lesson the hard way. In 2017, we had a famous, top-tier fund verbally commit to funding our entire seed round at a great valuation. After several meetings in SF, we came away overjoyed and overconfident.

This made us picky and disillusioned. We quickly learned that investors never say no. They almost assuredly say maybe. Unless you have a term sheet, you don't have a yes.

18. Travel & explore the world while you're still young.

I've been blessed to experience life in four cities in the last ~two years. And I wouldn't trade it for anything.

19. Give credit to those working behind the curtains.

One of my pet peeves is when the media credit all of a company's success to a singular entity (e.g. Tesla/ SpaceX/ SolarCity to Elon Musk, the Honest Company to Jessica Alba). Some of the greatest people on earth are unseen. They do their work with little fame or recognition -- it's important that they get their due too!

20. Always be in a state of learning.

21. Celebrate success...

22. ... and discuss failures.

Never sweep this under the rug. It's just as important to discuss failures and build prevention mechanisms. Talking about my fuckups in meticulous detail has definitely helped me prevent future ones.

23. Learn to say yes.

A lot of us (including myself) have become lazier, flakier, and less present in today's hyperconnected society. I'm trying to be more mindful and say yes to things in life. Say yes the next time friends want to discuss ideas, when family want to visit, or when people ask for help.

Share your ideas with your network.

I'm personally trying to do it more.

One of my goals for this year is to connect with a new person each week, and exchange ideas, experiences knowledge. If you're game, give me a shout at joseph@jhylee.com. I'd love to connect.

Here's to making 2018 the best one yet!

Thanks for reading,

Joe